Today I’m grateful that God responds. That the solution to feeling disconnected and far from heaven is to say to God, “I feel disconnected and far from heaven.” And God responds. He moves, he changes things. These last weeks have been hard for me, despite all the fantastic people in my life, despite how much I love my day-to-day. My friend died, and her death saddens me greatly. Not only that, but being in mourning makes it so much harder to ignore the close relationships that have been broken this year, the ones I can’t take comfort in anymore. So I find myself on my couch, without the will or energy to rise. When I feel like that I say to God, “I don’t have the will or energy to rise.” And God responds, and I feel a bit lighter, enough to move my limbs, enough to do the things I know will make me feel better, but which I couldn’t do without God’s response. It overwhelms me that God is not only willing to hear my complaint, but that he so easily and reliably responds.
I know it’s a bit Christian-y for this blog, but I don’t mind. At the end of the day, I believe that I was made to live in the center of God’s love, and to preach the good news that you were too.